Broom Wagon

I’m sorry for not having any updates for a while, but I haven’t been on my bike since a week ago Tuesday. I did make a Chinese food run on the bike today, but it’d been so long that I didn’t even have my bike shoes unpacked from my last ride at Ryan’s house. This feels like failure, and I’m not big on that. Tactical retreats, oh yeah, but not failure. But, really, who is. I really felt like I was back on the horse last week. Tuesday night after the ride my buddy likes to go to a blues jam right there in town. It’s a 3-fold thing for me. I gets me playing my clarinet, it’s good publicity for the music store I work/ed for, and it’s time out with a buddy, which I don’t get much of. Actually, make that 4. It gets me away from my mom for a night, who is on medication for depression. So, to me, all that out weighs the fact that it’s a late night. Then Wednesday night, an Aussie friend of mine wanted to chat on messenger, and that made 2 nights in a row I was up to midnight or later. I was toast and knew it. So, I told myself I would sleep real good and do Thursday training on Friday. Then Friday morning came a call from my boss saying that I needn’t come in to work that day. That the store that had been open for 60 years, and we had been fighting to keep open was closed. I had been putting in a fair amount of effort to help my boss build the place back up since the old staff had left, most of it emotional energy. For those who don’t know I left a, by all means, fairly successful Navy career to go back to school to finish my Jazz degree and go on and get my Music ed degree, which I just finished (hence, why i am 33 and living with my Mom). So I have a serious attachment to music, and I took the job seriously.

I went into the store Saturday to help my Irish/Italian boss. He was the personification of an emotional roller-coaster. To cheer me up my buddy Ryan invited me to go out boating with him and his dad on China Lake. There are lots of very rich out of state folks in this area at this time of year, so it was a treat. I made my first attempt at water-skiing. I almost made it the first time up. I gave it 3 more tries, but just couldn’t hold on. It was after I got out that I realized just how exhausted I was. And it was on the way home that I realized I had lost the use of my forearms. I was absolutely exhausted the next 2 days, and did a lot of sleeping. So basically week 3 was lost due to a bunch of bad choices.
But, I am very frustrated because I couldn’t even make it past one week of training. It was nice to have this month of coaching because, well, I have to live with the woman, and I wasn’t nagged about the time I was spending on the bike, or recovering. Although, she has asked me almost everyday for the past week if I’m going out riding. This a bit of a change from just before last summer when I told her that if I started training I would be gone for 2 or 3 hours on Sundays. The response was, “What!?” And the look was not that of what kind of super-human feat is that. It was one of, that’s 3 hours of you not being around to do what I want you to do for me. She gave birth to me, you know. And lets not get started on the little old lady next door who hasn’t bothered to call a plummer to fixer her sink for months, because she thinks I’m her personal handy-man (wonder who she got THAT idea from). Anyway, the point is, I just can’t seem to organize the time I have to get some riding in. I need to ride to be healthier and to be more of who I want to be. I just feel like I’m stuck in a nasty catch 22. And then, on top of it I feel like I’ve let Al and Jeff down by not sticking to something they gave me for FREE. I really thought having a coach would give me that extra bit of motivation to stick to something. But that lasted about as long as my own attempt at training myself. I will say that one week was the most effective week of bike riding I’ve ever had.
This is how um-motivated I am. I have not one, but 2 small piles of parts waiting to go on my 2 bikes, and I don’t even want to do that. I have been very successful at waisting tons of time plying with my new phone though. It may end up being a small gift of mental piece, as I can now lock myself in my room like a teenager and surf the internet to my hearts content. :D
So, here’s where I am. I have a race the end of this month. I was thinking today that I will just skip it. But, the Bicycle Guy has been getting busy, and I have a frameset I have said I will pick up, build up and ship to Australia. Also, I have an old college bike club buddy who’s house I’m going to crash at and we are going to the race together. So, I have to go in other words. I’m not convinced this is good. But it does correspond with Ploughman’s (I believe) theory that the best way to make sure you do an event is to make it so you have no choice.
I will try to do another fit test at some point to see how far I have come. But I’m sure I’ve lost a step since 2 weeks ago. Oh, and I go back to work tomorrow, not that I really stopped, because I have been trying to finish up a major sale and not screw the people out of equipment they need.
Just to be clear, I know I’m not battling serious issues like some of the more inspirational folks on here. I feel I’m facing stuff that the average person faces. That’s how I’ve always approached this blog. I’m was hopping to document how normal life duffs up normal people who just want to ride their bikes faster. Maybe someone can gleam something from this and it’ll help them be more successful in their attempts.
We’ll see what happens,